Eating Tink`s Face

So approximately 3 feet away from me, Bethany is sitting on the couch gnawing on a 2 foot tall chocolate statue of Tinkerbell that she got for 89 cents at superstore. (Down from $10 at Easter, so a good deal.) Anyways, as she's eating Tink's face I started thinking about how it really isn't fair that Fairies are so awesome. Really, think about it, they have it all. Two arms, two legs AND TWO WINGS.  Then I started to get jealous and came up with the following list of why.

1. They are super tiny and cute and don't even have to make any effort to be that way!
2. They are the only ones who can legitimately walk around in tights as pants.
3.  No one questions it if they want to wear tutus every day.
4. They get to sleep in FLOWERS!
5. They have a permanent supply of Fairy Dust. I don't know what that stuff does, but it makes people happy, or sleepy, or gives them special skills. It's like a drug that they just always have. Not that I'm into drugs, but I could sell it and pay off my student loans quicker.
6. They get to fly. For free. No airport taxes, no baggage fees. And if they are tired they can just ride on a bumblebee.
7. It's not creepy that they get to go into peoples rooms late at night and just hang out. Dude. If I was a fairy, I'd be in Zac Efron's room. A Lot.
8. They talk to animals! No translator. Amazing.
9. They light up at night. No need for a flashlight ever! Or electricity. My hydro bill would be non-existant! Woot Woot! Talk about a small carbon footprint. (get it, small foot print? Cus they are not using electricity AND are tiny, so they have tiny feet)
10. Fairies can find a whole groups of lost boys who just need a good woman to take care of them. They make it seem easy to find a good man!

And that is why Fairies have it made. It really isn`t fair.